If I Rise
by ScaryBones
Summary: Gregory, Christophe, Damien and Pip end up trapped in the desert when they anger a well-known mobster.
1. Chapter 1

** Gregory, Christophe, Damien and Pip end up trapped in the desert when they anger a well-known mobster. **

** Just warning you now, this is probably going to have a LOT of Gregory in it because, as always, he's invading my mind. The title should be "Gregory's Desert Adventure With Some Other People" because it's going to probably focus a lot of him. I'll try to fight it. :D**

** Gregstophe, Dip, maybe even little, obscenely miniscure amounts of Dristophe. I wouldn't count on Gregory/Pip, though, lol**

** xxx**

Christophe knew that saying no to Loogie wasn't such a great idea, but Gregory had insisted that they weren't going to kill a dentist just because he had suspicious about the activities Loogie was up to. The mobster look-alike had screamed into the phone, and threatened to remove certain parts of Christophe's anatomy, and the French boy had let him yell. He knew he'd have to watch his back for a while, but didn't really expect anything he couldn't handle.

When he'd told Gregory of the threats, the blond had scoffed. "Please, you know he can't follow up on any of his threats." Christophe had agreed. Damien, who they'd hired on a few years back, had laughed at the pathetic threat.

"_Pip _is scarier than that terrible excuse for a gangster." Christophe could _kind of _agree to that; he'd seen what had happened back in high school when students mistook the proud Brit as a French boy. It wasn't pretty.

"However, I think we should probably lay low for a while," Gregory insisted. "As pathetic as he is, he does have strength in numbers."

Damien and Christophe had scoffed at his, but reluctantly agreed. Christophe could only take on so many people at a time, and Damien's power had been stripped away at his father's insistence. Satan just didn't want the angels to detect the presence of the anti-christ just yet.

It had been about a month later, when they'd let their guard down, that they'd finally been caught.

The three mercenaries, plus Pip, had been sitting in the basement of Christophe's house, looking over a strange email. It had horrible spelling, something that urked Gregory to no end, and the message it was trying to convey wasn't exactly clear. Damien read it out loud, his usually confident voice stumbling over the pronounciations.

_Deer traiters:_

_ U think that u can just say no to me? well u got another thing coming if u thing u can get away w/ denying me my requests. u better watch your backsides b/c u just might find a Nife stabbed into them._

_ -u know who_

"Great, not only do we have to deal with Loogie, but Volemorte's after us as well," Damien joked. Gregory rolled his eyes and Christophe cocked his head, never having read the Harry Potter series, but Pip had started laughing.

It was just after Pip had calmed down when the door at the top of the stairs was kicked open and an object thrown in. It clanked down the stairs and landed near them. They looked at it in confusion, wondering what exactly it was. By the time Gregory had figured it out, it was too late. A cloud of gas exploded from the object, filling the room. There was no other exit in the room, and the last thing they saw before they collapsed was the smug smile of Loogie at the top of the stairs before he shut the door.

The first thing Christophe noticed was that he couldn't see. He tried to bring his hands to his eyes to see what was wrong, only discovering that they were bound roughly. He was able to hear, however, and recognized the familiar sound of an engine and what sounded like tires digging into gravel. Two male voices also invaded his ears.

"The only reason people hate Rebecca Black is because it's _cool_ to hate her."

"This again?" The other one asked. Christophe tuned out their conversation, trying to feel around his surroundings. He discreetly (or so he hoped) rolled his body until, not even a full roll later, he hit something.

Or someone, he soon discovered, as he heard a grunt. He immediately recognized the voice as Gregory's and pressed his body closer to the blonde.

"Hey, they're awake," one of the men from earlier said. His companion chuckled.

"Well, well, well, fags," he began. "Looks like you're about to pay for saying no to Loogie. You see, he doesn't take kindly to people who don't do as he says."

Christophe tried to tell the man to shut up, but his muffled voice fell on deaf ears. The men chuckled, and one shot his arm back, hitting Christophe upside the head. He scowled, but knowing he couldn't do anything just yet, didn't retaliate. Instead he just lay there, waiting for whatever was going to happen, to happen.

He didn't have to wait long. The tires screeched as the van came to a stop, sending the occupants to the front of the vehicle. It was then that Christophe discovered it wasn't just him and Gregory, like he had first thought. The too-warm-to-be-human body that crashed into him told him that Damien was also with them, and a girlish squeak let him know that Pip had also been dragged into this as well. _He was going to kill Loogie_.

That is, if he survived whatever the fat mobster had planned for the group of four.

The men got out of the van, coming around and opening the back doors. Although he couldn't see, Christophe knew that one of them was reaching for him. He let them grab him and pull him out, dumping him onto the hot, sandy ground. This confused him, and instead of jumping up and attacking the two men, he found himself wondering where exactly in the world he was. Three bodies were thrown on top of him, thoroughly knocking the air out of him. He didn't have a chance to throw the others off of him before he heard the whine of a starting engine and rocks scattering as the van drove away.

"Where the bloody hell are we?" Damien shouted, rolling off of the brunette.

"Calm down," Gregory's voice called out, and Christophe felt the blonde shifting on him. In a matter of minutes, he felt his blindfold being taken off. After such a long time unable to see anything combined with the brightness of the sun, he still couldn't see anything. Slowly his eyes began adjusting, and he saw the outline of Gregory staring down at him as he undid the binds around his wrists. "We've been kidnapped."

"_Merde_." Christophe reached for his ankles to unbind them while the blonde worked on untying the blindfold around Damien's head. The antichrist scowled as soon as he took in where they were; everywhere around them was nothing but pure desert. There were some mountains scattered way off in the distance, but save for them, all they could see was nothing but cacti. Pip let out a squeal of distress when he had a chance to look around, and Damien gave him a worried look.

"Did they leave us out here to die?" the blonde asked, crawling toward the antichrist and clutching onto his turtle neck. "We're going to die!"

"No we're not," Gregory snapped, shooting a glare at the other Brit. "We just need to walk back to civilization."

"Um, and how do you think we're going to do that?" Damien asked, kicking the binds from his ankles. "Do you see anything other than desert, or do you have the ability to see farther than the son of Satan?"

Gregory sighed. He could already feel a headache coming on, and the sun beating down on him wasn't helping. "It doesn't take a demon to know that we just need to follow the tire tracks those morons left behind them. Obviously they're going to take the shortest route back to South Park. Now let's get going; I don't want to die from dehydration and we've got a long ways to go."

The others just shot each other short glances before following Gregory, who was walking at a fast pace. The blonde was staring down at the tire tracks, a determined look on his face. Christophe walked slightly behind him, muttering curses to Loogie and the two men that had left them out here and to God. Damien and Pip were a good distance behind the two mercenaries, as Pip was a slow walker. Even in their situation, Christophe could hear the dodgeball champion talking excitedly about the cacti surrounding them. "Look, are those flowers on the tops? And look at the cute birds burrowed in that cactis! What do you suppose they eat, Damien?"

"Hopefully not humans," the red-eyed boy muttered. He was sweltering under his thick shirt, even though he knew he should've been used to this type of weather - he was a hellion, after all. He figured it was because his lack of powers that made the heat so unbearable. And the fact that his boyfriend was walking so close to him didn't help; although Pip's body temperature wasn't as high as his, it still had an impact. It wasn't long at all before sweat matted his hair to his face. "Hey, Mr. Perfect!" he called to Gregory. "How much further do you think we need to go? I'm dying over here."

The blonde rolled his eyes and sighed before calling back, "If you two are going to walk so far behind, my estimate is that it will take a couple days to a week at most."

"A couple days?" Pip asked, his tone desperate. "What will we eat? I have to go to the bathroom; what if there are wild animals out here that want to eat us? I don't think I could sleep in sand, except I've heard that it's supposed to be relaxing. I mean, isn't that was bean bags are filled with?"

"_Bean_ bags are filled with beans, Pip," Damien said, staring bewildered at the other. "Are you that dense?"

Pip huffed, giving an angry pout to the dark-haired boy before walking faster, running a little to catch up to Gregory and Christophe. Damien, not really wanting to run, lagged behind for a while, until he heard Gregory say something about wild coyotes. The he ran like the wind until he was nuzzled safely between the Frenchman and Pip, although he was careful not to let his fear show.

"Coyotes are just savage forms of dogs," he stated.

"Actually, they're in the cat family," Gregory corrected, a tired tone in his voice.

"Well that's stupid," Damien commented. Pip, seeming to have forgiven him already, smiled and put an arm around his shoulder. They continued walking on, silence finally settling over the group. Gregory muttered a few curses about his hair, and ran his fingers through it several time, trying to straighten the curls that were starting to spring up. Christophe pulled his green shirt over his head, using it to wipe the sweat of his face. He was mildly worried about getting a sunburn on his arms - his tank top protected the rest of him - but the thought didn't bother him too much. He'd gone through more torturous situations, he was sure he could handle a little heat.

**xxx**

** Okay, I just couldn't wait anymore. I'm just going to work on Your Guardian Angel AND this fic at the same time...and the rest of the requests (which I STILL haven't done).**

**"After your mother and I did it, she went and made me a sandwich," Gregory said. Kenny's face went pale. He knew the truth - there wasn't any bread in the house.**

**"You - you monster!" he shouted, tackling the other blonde. Gregory smirked and laughed maniacally.**

**"So you know my dark secret, eh?" Suddenly, Gregory's mouth opened wide - too wide to be human. Kenny jumped off of him, and watched in horror as Gregory's body turned inside out. Kenny noticed the sandwich as the Brit's stomach emerged from within, and snatched it.**

**"Yummy!" Kenny said, hungrily eating the sandwhich. He looked at the inverted body of Gregory on his floor and sighed. He'd clean it up in the morning.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Is it bad that I still imagine Damien with a high voice? Not as high as when he was a kid, but still higher than the others...maybe matching Pip's. :C**

**xxx**

It had only a couple hours after they'd been kidnapped and dumped in what Christophe could only describe as Hell, and Damien already had a bright red burn going across his cheeks and nose. He'd never experienced anything like it before - his powers in Hell kept him from feeling the scorching heat of the flames, and of course, protected him from any form of sunburns.

"Don't touch it, Damien," Pip advised, watching as Damien winced when he ran his hand across his cheek.

"It hurts," he said, but continued touching it, amazed at the feeling. "Why aren't you as red as me?"

"Well, maybe because _I've_ been sunburned before," Pip suggested. "I probably have some sort of immunity to it." Gregory scoffed.

"That is the most flawed logic I've ever heard of."

"_I _don't think so," Pip insisted. "My skin's been burned before. Damien's hasn't._ He's _never been exposed to the sun's rays without his powers."

Gregory, thinking this over and deciding that it _did_ make some sense, but not wanting to admit he was wrong, just huffed and walked faster. "Keep up."

Damien snickered, earning a poke on the cheek from Christophe, who chuckled darkly when the antichrist yelped in pain. "Don't touch me!"

"This ees going to be interesting." Christophe smirked as he ran to keep up with his blonde companion.

xxx

"_There was a blonde who had a dog and Moley was his name-o_," Damien sang, swinging Pip's hand in his as they walked. "_M-o-l-e-y, M-o-l-e-y, M-o-l-_"

"Damien,_ please_," Gregory begged. He ran a hand through his hair, which he immediately regretted. It only reminded him that his unruly curls were attracting all kinds of dirt and maybe even some bugs. He sighed. "It's bad enough that Pip just finished 'ninety-nine bottles of beer on the wall'. We don't need you to start up another annoying song."

"I'm just trying to raise the morale."

"This coming from the antichrist," Gregory muttered, picking up his pace.

"I know! Why don't we play a game?" Pip suggested, earning another sigh from Gregory. "Ooh! Let's play I Spy! I'll start. I spy with my little eye...something blue."

"...The sky," Damien answered, rolling his eyes.

"Good job, Damien! That's right!" Pip exclaimed, clapping his hands together. "Now you go."

"I spy with my demon eye...something purple."

There was a long pause as Pip tried to guess. He looked all around the vast landscape, muttering to himself. Gregory smiled. Finally there'd be silence for a while.

"My socks!" Pip suddenly shouted. "_Very_ clever, Damien! Who wants to go next?"

They continued on in this matter, the only participants being Damien and Pip, while Gregory walked further and further ahead to get away from the annoying blonde. He just needed to clear his head and think about what they were going to do as soon as they got back to South Park. Killing Loogie would be a good start.

"I Spy a blonde who looks like he's in a bad mood."

"Shut up. I've had enough of your stupid games," Gregory snapped, losing his last nerve. "We should have never even contacted Loogie! Why did you even suggest it?"

"Me?" Damien asked, furrowing his brows. "It wasn't my idea to talk to Loogie! I thought _you_ wanted to work with him!"

"I never said I did!" Gregory shouted, getting angrier. "_You_ were the one who said it would be a good idea to contact him. And look where that got us!""

"Are you blaming me for us getting trapped out here?" Damien shouted back.

"_You_ were the one who wanted to do business with him in the first place," Gregory said, furious. He made his voice higher, mimicking Damien. " '_Oh, come on, nothing will go wrong. He's Italian, what can he do?_' He can catch four people and leave them stranded in a desert to die, that's what he can do!"

"How was _I_ suppose to know he was crazy?" Damien yelled, taking a step toward the Brit. "Besides, it was _your_ boyfriend who said no to the mission he offered us, not me!"

"It's not Tophe's fault we're in this mess!" Gregory sighed and put a hand to his head, trying to calm himself down.

"It's not my fault, either." Damien crossed his arms.

"Oh, it's _no one's_ fault!" Pip cried, throwing his hands up. He tugged on Damien's shirt. "Please, Damien, just calm down."

"I _am_ calm!" Damien cried. "Telling me to calm down when I'm already calm unleashes a fury not even Hell can contain!"

"Shut up, all of you!" Christophe growled, deciding to be the mediator. "Eet doesn't matter who's fault eet ees, just zat we don't die!"

"You're only saying that because you know it's your fault we're stuck out here," Damien snapped. "If you hadn't been all goody-two-shoes and just said yes to the mission, then we wouldn't be-" Damien was cut off by Christophe's fist hitting him right in the mouth. Pip let out a sharp cry and Gregory gasped. The antichrist put a hand to his face and curled the fingers of his other hand into Christophe's hair, throwing him down to the ground. "Don't you dare touch me!"

The brunette growled and kicked the back of Damien's knees, sending the pale boy to the ground.

"Stop it!" Pip shouted. "Let's not fight, please!"

Damien hissed as he hit the ground and scrambled over to Christophe, scratching the French boy's face a couple times before he was dragged off by an irritated Gregory and a shocked Pip. "What's the matter with you two?" Gregory yelled. "As if we already aren't in enough trouble!"

Christophe scowled and picked himself up off the ground, glaring daggers at raven-haired nineteen-year-old. "He better keep 'is mouth shut."

"You better keep your hands to yourself, you lousy French piece of-" Damien gasped and ducked as a boot was thrown at his head.

"Oh, let's all get along," Pip said, glancing nervously between the two panting teens.

"What a great idea, Phillip," Gregory supported, grabbing his boyfriend's boot and handing it back to him. "I think there's been enough drama for one day..."

Damien grumbled but nodded his head. "Let's just look for a place to rest. I'm sweating like a whore in church."

Pip's worried face disappeared and he laughed. "Like a priest on a playground!"

Gregory smiled slightly, his stressed mood already lifting. He looked around, spotting a Joshua tree. He smiled tiredly and went to go sit under it with Christophe following suit. They dropped down under it and rested their backs against its trunk. Christophe pulled his tank top away from his neck a couple times, trying to create a breeze while his blonde companion unbuttoned the top of his shirt.

"It's hot," Pip commented, sitting down gently next to Christophe.

"You don't say," Damien deadpanned. He remained standing, following Christophe's lead and pulling on the neck of his shirt a few times before pulling the thick material over his head. "Ah, much better." He threw the turtleneck on the ground and sat on it.

"You're going to get burned, Damien!" Pip exclaimed. "You can't go walking around under the sun exposed!"

"I'd rather burn than faint from heat stroke," Damien stated. Pip stared at the demon with a concerned gaze. "I'll be _fine_, Pip. Don't worry your pretty blonde head about me." Pip frowned.

"I want to go home." Damien looked away, a distressed look on his face.

"I know..."

There was a long silence that made Christophe squirm. Gregory wished they'd start up another game of I Spy.

After a while, Damien stood, looking determined. "Let's go." He tied the sleeves of his shirt around his hips and grabbed Pip's hand, smiling awkwardly. "Let's make like a tree and leaf."

Pip's face automatically lightened. "That was terrible, Damien." He let the red-eyed boy pull him up. "We should make like a banana and split."

Gregory cracked a smile. "Let's make like a hockey player and get the puck out of here."

The four burst out laughing, all the tension melting off their shoulders as they left the shade of the tree. Even the harsh glare of the sun couldn't burn their high spirits.

**xxx**

**"...Put your trust in the mission**

**We will not repent**

**This is our religion..."**

**-Some song from SlipknoT**

**XD**


End file.
